So it's pretty obvious by now that after chemo there was no switch that magically flipped back and turned life back to normal. If only things would work like that...
Herceptin treatment continues. At the same floor, with the same nurses. Which basically means major chemo flashback! This whole thing really upsets me. It brings back so many bad memories. I got to take pills for nausea this time. I have to admit I didn't want to take any more pills after chemo. Enough poison went through my body. But the nurse told me to choose between being nausea for the rest of the year or pop a pill every now and then. So I gave in and took the pills.
I am actually a bit disappointed by the whole Her-'crap'-tin. I think it was sort of described as a walk in the park after chemo. But during the last round I got diarrhoea the first day and I was very tired for the next three days. I had to take naps during the afternoon again. First you try to resist because again: major chemo flashback! But you better just give in and I have to admit I really do feel better after three days. But it's just not what I was expecting. Of course the side effects are mild compared to chemo and I know I have to accept them and get used to it. Make this part of my routine. Because I'll be getting Herceptin for the rest of the year (and then some more).
The Herceptin flows through the IV in 30 minutes. I wonder if I have less side effects if they like for example set it to an hour. I really have to ask next time. The nurses have been sweet and understanding, but also strict. I appreciate their advice but sometimes I also believe I have to follow my own path. I still haven't made up my mind about whether or not I want to go into therapy or something like that. But my last chemo was only six weeks ago, (yes that short!). So I have to give it time and I can reach out for help any time I want to. For now I just want peace & balance.
Oh and a little patience would be nice. With people. With hair growth. People asking about hair growth. That sort of thing.
Showing posts with label her2-positive. Show all posts
Showing posts with label her2-positive. Show all posts
May 22, 2013
March 29, 2013
Being a wild bird
So looking back at my previous post it would be fair to say I had a few things on my mind that were bothering me.
So yesterday when I got out of bed I figured hey this is my life we're talking about. My heart. Let's take back control. And it felt really really good.
I decided to email my oncologist instead of waiting for him to call. That same afternoon he replied. Basically he told me he wants do a MUGA scan and until the results come back no Herceptin for me.
A MUGA scan creates video images of the ventricles (lower chambers of the heart that hold blood) to check whether they are pumping blood properly. It shows any abnormalities in the size of the ventricles and in the movement of the blood through the heart. Today the hospital called me and we scheduled the scan for next week Tuesday.
So there you have it. I feel a little more at ease and also very determined on finishing these Herceptin treatments. Which is kinda crazy of course... Because at first I was so not looking forward to them. But now I realize this treatment was prescribed for a reason and that is why it is so god damn important I finish every single one of them.
Of course if the results from the MUGA scan are seriously fucked up and the risk is too high... well then it becomes a different story. You see I don't want to die of a heart attack. That would be a bit ironic.
So yesterday when I got out of bed I figured hey this is my life we're talking about. My heart. Let's take back control. And it felt really really good.
I decided to email my oncologist instead of waiting for him to call. That same afternoon he replied. Basically he told me he wants do a MUGA scan and until the results come back no Herceptin for me.
A MUGA scan creates video images of the ventricles (lower chambers of the heart that hold blood) to check whether they are pumping blood properly. It shows any abnormalities in the size of the ventricles and in the movement of the blood through the heart. Today the hospital called me and we scheduled the scan for next week Tuesday.
So there you have it. I feel a little more at ease and also very determined on finishing these Herceptin treatments. Which is kinda crazy of course... Because at first I was so not looking forward to them. But now I realize this treatment was prescribed for a reason and that is why it is so god damn important I finish every single one of them.
Of course if the results from the MUGA scan are seriously fucked up and the risk is too high... well then it becomes a different story. You see I don't want to die of a heart attack. That would be a bit ironic.
September 17, 2012
Meeting the oncologist
Today I had my first appointment with my oncologist. Appointments that are never easy. These are the moments where you have to face the facts over and over again.
The facts: the tumor is gone. When I do absolutely nothing I have a 80% chance of living my life like a normal person. When I go through all the treatment (the full package) the survival rate goes up to more than 90%. So a girl does what a girl gotta do. Two weeks after finishing radiation I will start my first chemo. I will get 8 rounds of chemo and 13 rounds of Herceptin (in cancer land we call this: 4x AC, 4x TH and 13x H). So you do the math... this means this whole thing is going to keep me busy for more than a year.
I sort of knew. But when you're being told like that.. well it's not easy. "It's not going to be easy", my oncologist said. He was convinced my body was able to handle it all, but being fit mentally is just as important. If I need help, all I have to do is ask. He seemed like a very nice and calm guy who makes time for you. Absolutely willing to answer all of my questions. He also knew exactly when to make a joke. After I told him I google a lot for information about breast cancer he asked me whether or not I googled him as well (haha I am so going to now).
I seriously want to focus on my radiation. But it's so hard because there is so much other information and preparations you have to deal with (dentist, ENT specialist, the wig and so on and on). It just never stops.
The facts: the tumor is gone. When I do absolutely nothing I have a 80% chance of living my life like a normal person. When I go through all the treatment (the full package) the survival rate goes up to more than 90%. So a girl does what a girl gotta do. Two weeks after finishing radiation I will start my first chemo. I will get 8 rounds of chemo and 13 rounds of Herceptin (in cancer land we call this: 4x AC, 4x TH and 13x H). So you do the math... this means this whole thing is going to keep me busy for more than a year.
I sort of knew. But when you're being told like that.. well it's not easy. "It's not going to be easy", my oncologist said. He was convinced my body was able to handle it all, but being fit mentally is just as important. If I need help, all I have to do is ask. He seemed like a very nice and calm guy who makes time for you. Absolutely willing to answer all of my questions. He also knew exactly when to make a joke. After I told him I google a lot for information about breast cancer he asked me whether or not I googled him as well (haha I am so going to now).
I seriously want to focus on my radiation. But it's so hard because there is so much other information and preparations you have to deal with (dentist, ENT specialist, the wig and so on and on). It just never stops.
August 25, 2012
The plan
So what are your plans for the future? Well I'll be fighting cancer. I've had my appointment with the surgeon and it was another long and confronting talk.
Let's start with the good news: after more research the sentinel lymph node was again negative for cancer. The tumor was 1.8 cm and was removed completely. So goodbye to you little fucker. The wounds/scars are healing and I do feel somewhat better.
The bad news is that it was a grade 3 cancer. Obviously a high grade aggressive cancer that grows faster and is more likely to spread. This means lots and lots of treatment. Not only was my tumor hormone-receptor positive but it was also found her2-positive (a protein thing).
So in short this is the plan:
1) Within 4-6 weeks I will start radiation therapy. About 25-30 times. Probably 5 times a week.
2) My chemo will start about two weeks after finishing radiation therapy (hopefully about 6-8 times).
3) During the chemo my herceptin will start and will continue after finishing chemo (not sure yet how many times but probably a lot). Herceptin has far fewer immediate side effects than chemotherapy. For example, there is usually no nausea or hair loss. However, there is a small but real risk of heart damage and possible lung damage.
4) Last but not least: hormone blocking therapy for five years.
So yeah.. that's a lot. To handle. For one person. I'm pretty scared of how my body is going to cope with all of this. Not to mention the mind. But it's not like I have a choice. So crazy medical roller coaster... here I come.
Let's start with the good news: after more research the sentinel lymph node was again negative for cancer. The tumor was 1.8 cm and was removed completely. So goodbye to you little fucker. The wounds/scars are healing and I do feel somewhat better.
The bad news is that it was a grade 3 cancer. Obviously a high grade aggressive cancer that grows faster and is more likely to spread. This means lots and lots of treatment. Not only was my tumor hormone-receptor positive but it was also found her2-positive (a protein thing).
So in short this is the plan:
1) Within 4-6 weeks I will start radiation therapy. About 25-30 times. Probably 5 times a week.
2) My chemo will start about two weeks after finishing radiation therapy (hopefully about 6-8 times).
3) During the chemo my herceptin will start and will continue after finishing chemo (not sure yet how many times but probably a lot). Herceptin has far fewer immediate side effects than chemotherapy. For example, there is usually no nausea or hair loss. However, there is a small but real risk of heart damage and possible lung damage.
4) Last but not least: hormone blocking therapy for five years.
So yeah.. that's a lot. To handle. For one person. I'm pretty scared of how my body is going to cope with all of this. Not to mention the mind. But it's not like I have a choice. So crazy medical roller coaster... here I come.
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