So what is chemo like? Well I'm having a hard time finding the right words for it. I think most of us would describe it as flu-like but that doesn't exactly cover it. It's worse. It's a black hole. You are very aware of the fact it's taking over your body and even your mind. It's heavy. It feels like the end of the world and you're never going to be able to crawl out of that black hole ever again.
Six or seven days later.. you're doing better. Just like that. It's crazy; you're eating Dutch kale and pizza again. Or chocolate chip muffins your friend brought by! Your state of mind changes. Every now and then even the sun starts to shine again.
But of course in the back of your mind you know it's not over and you have to prepare for the next round. My first chemo I was scheduled for a double room. But because of some trouble they had that morning I hit jack pot and got to stay in the room suitable for five people. The whole experience was so overwhelming. The nurses running around. All the beeping infusions. Ringing alarm clocks. I hated it.
The radiation treatment place and the breast cancer department at my hospital were both renovated places. The atmosphere was warm and peaceful. Everything chemo department is NOT. I'm going to bring my iPod next time. Dive into my own little world.
Next time on She Still Dreams in Colour: hair loss.