September 2, 2012

Growing pains

A few days after I was diagnosed with breast cancer I remember my sister and I sitting in the car. Going somewhere to clear our heads. We were talking about how everybody around us all of a sudden seemed pregnant. Waiting at the traffic lights I remember her saying, "It's so weird... some people have babies..." and then I finished her sentence, "and some people get a tumor."

Now only a few weeks later I have started this project that might be my only chance of ever getting pregnant. Life is ironic. Oh yeah and pretty much fucked up.

Life was just happening. It was good. Perhaps not very adventurous. A little on the safe side. But I was owning my own house. A nice job, with exciting new changes coming my way. Totally in love with my two furry bunnies. Living the single life and definitely not thinking about children. Then BAM! Cancer.

So I've had another echo and the four little eggs are growing. They have to be between 15 - 20 mm before the egg retrieval can take place. I have to come back for another echo tomorrow. I'm not really looking forward to the whole retrieval thing. In case you are wondering why.. Once the doctor feels I have reached the criteria to proceed to the egg retrieval, she will tell me to inject myself with human chorionic gonadotropin (HCG), a hormone, to finalize growth and maturation of the eggs. This injection is very carefully timed so that the egg retrieval will occur at the optimal time just before ovulation occurs.

During the egg retrieval I will get some pain medication by an IV. A needle is attached to an internal ultrasound probe, which is inserted into the vagina (OOH MY GAAWD!). The doctor uses the ultrasound to see the ovaries and locate the ovarian follicles. The needle punctures each follicle, and a gentle suction is applied to remove the egg and fluid within the follicle. An embryologist then evaluates the fluid and finds the egg. Then it's hop hop into the freezer (do not put me next to the frozen meat puh-lease!). After egg retrieval, you may experience cramping and feelings of fullness or pressure. You get to go home after an hour of recovery.

Well it all sounds lovely doesn't it?


  1. Oh maaan... I hope you get to the HCG stage fast and that the procedure is quick and painless... you will be pretty drugged up you so won't feel much. It's just a bit uncomfortable. Make sure to bring a pad that day cause there will be a bit of blood afterwards. Good luck my friend! xo

    1. Hi Ashley I have to use the last injection at 12 a.m. tonight! Which means the egg retrieval will take place on Wednesday. Thanks you (also for the advice)!

  2. Every time I read of another YOUNG girl (ok.. woman) with breast cancer, it's like someone stomped on my heart. You are too young. Know that you are supported by many.... most of whom you don't even realize...


  3. Oh wat spannend!! Fijn dat het eind in zicht is. Ik hoop dat het allemaal gauw achter de rug is. Het komt goed, de laatste loodjes... heel veel sterkte!!

  4. All those procedures, and not even with a pregnancy in mind but 'only' the possibility of a pregnancy, somewhere in the future.. When i was pregnant, i joined the "moeders voor moeders" thing. It meant that during the first three months you had to save your pee, so they could extract the HCG hormone from it, for women who couldn't get pregnant that easy. Never crossed my mind that you'd need it in your situation, too. Weird how things sometimes turn out.. Wishing you all the luck tomorrow!!

    1. Oh haha that made me smile! Maybe I injected your pee LOL! Xx

    2. I hoped it would :) it was kinda gross indeed, but well, all for the good purpose right? If you'll need more pee, please let me know :p xx